I'm not stressed, at least i donot feel like it, i just feel crazily tired.  I am barely awake the whole day.  even on the bus, I have trouble ensuring that I keep my eyes open.  This is very strange.  I was not even reading anything.  Actually, i find some of my readings quite interesting.
I am worried.  Worried as to whether I am down with something.  Whether Im coming down with depression.  I am not making this up.  I hate feeling what I feel.  this is the first time Im NOT feeling tired and sleepy, but I think its the effect of caffeine in my Tea.  I wish I know what is happening.  Why I can't just be lazy and know it.  I hate feeling like this.  I want to know what is happening.  I want to feel responsible to what happens to myself, good or bad.
Oh, Im feeling some pain in my left shoulder blade. About 2 weeks ago, I had some chest pain when I breath. it lasted for about a day.  At some times, it was so bad I had to bend over to take a breath.
I need to focus.  Live in the moment.  Concentrate on what is important: school, study, Public Law, Equity and Trusts.  THEY ARE MY LIFE NOW.  Until 5th May.  Nothing else matters, including pain, sleep, food.  
Now I just need to convince myself of it.
Tuesday, April 7
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